Assertiveness and Confidence

One of the key skills for an entrepreneur and an employee is Communication Skills. Communication Skills are those qualities that help you maintain  good relationships in your personal life and work life. Moreover, they help you communicate effectively such that your message reaches across exactly like you want to, with minimum distortions in the meaning. We’ve already established the importance of such skills here.

There are certain types of personalities based on this –

  1. Passive: Changing minds according to others’ preferences, submissive behaviour
  2. Aggressive: Causing physical or emotional harm, frequent outbursts
  3. Passive-Aggressive: Indirect Resistance to others’ preferences or demands, Avoiding confrontation
  4. Assertive: Standing up for yourself in a calm and positive manner

Consequently, we can understand that the most ideal form of personality is being Assertive. Assertiveness is a direct consequence of your confidence. It’s not difficult to understand that assertiveness works on your ability to say ‘no’. Most people have trouble saying “No”, especially when a superior is concerned. But, introspection is the key to realization. It’s essential that you understand what is asked of you and whether it violates any of your principles, faith or beliefs.

Assertive individuals are those who can get their point across without hurting or upsetting anyone; also, without upsetting yourself. One of the major myths revolving around this trait is that assertive people always have the “I’m always right” approach. It’s time to bust that myth. Assertive people ARE NOT always right, instead they are always understanding.

Being assertive is composed of two elements –

  1. Standing up for your faiths, beliefs and, principles.
  2. Respecting others’ faiths, beliefs and, principles.

Here are certain tips that will help you develop your assertiveness –

  • Don’t just hear, listen. Listen to what others have to say and respond appropriately.
  • Ask before assuming.
  • Appreciate others’ hard work and give them credit when due.
  • Admit if you were wrong and apologize.
  • Be responsible and accountable.
  • Believe that you deserve to be treated with respect and dignity. Extend the same courtesy towards others.
  • Identify your needs and work on them accordingly. Don’t expect others to spoonfeed you.
  • Maintain your individuality. Don’t be submissive.
  • Accept compliments and criticism politely. Be humble.
  • Know your limits and learn to say a “NO’.

Developing your confidence and your assertiveness is an ongoing process. A little effort everyday will eventually lead to a much more confident, wise and, empathetic individual.

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